


in a moment

by mockturtletale



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Angst, Coda, Fluff, M/M, Yearning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-15
Updated: 2015-04-15
Packaged: 2018-03-23 03:21:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3752575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mockturtletale/pseuds/mockturtletale
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everything about Luke looks soft, is the problem.</p>
<p>[ Calum POV scene from <a href="http://archiveofourown.org/works/2170422">build on me, build on me</a>. ]</p>
            </blockquote>





	in a moment

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted to [tumblr](http://mockturtletale.tumblr.com/post/116483364253/for-the-anon-who-wrote-such-lovely-words-about) and dedicated to the lovely anon who prompted it. 
> 
> Title from 'Heartbreak Dream' by Betty Who.

It feels like whatever is in Calum’s head is trying to burrow it’s way _out_. His whole skull is throbbing around the headache, and his eyeballs hurt, his eyebrows do too. Sometimes Calum gets migraines, and when he does, he almost always wishes he could reach into his own head and pull the pain out. He has taken painkillers, and they’ll get to work soon enough, but in the meantime all Calum can do is lie in the smallest, quietest, darkest, least-populated space he can find and mope-ily wish that Luke was here to make him feel better.

The rest of Calum’s band is off together somewhere else in the maze of corridors that make up backstage. They’re all bundled up together in a bright, loud room, making as much noise as they can and getting amped for the show they’re about to play. They’re pretty much the last place Calum wants to be right now, even if he does hate being by himself.

But then the door swishes open, a soft drag of sound that cuts carefully into Calum’s solemn contemplation of his misery, and Calum holds his breath, hoping he won’t be discovered, because whoever it is that’s come to find him, it can’t be who he wants. Calum isn’t that lucky.

But he is today.

It’s Luke’s face that appears over the edge of the lounge, grinning down at him, dimples and all, until he seems to remember where they are and why; peers down at Calum in soft concern instead.

Everything about Luke looks soft, is the problem. He’s mostly stage-ready already, his hair swirled forward into a quiff in easy whorls. His eyes are big and blue, even in the dark, and his mouth is right there, lip ring tugged up between his teeth the way it is when he gets nervous. He’s smiling anyway. He looks down at Calum like he’s teetering on the edge of something more than just the couch, his fingers clenched in the upholstery, and Calum feels so fucking sorry for himself right then that he gives in to the urge to be kind to himself, just this once.

“’m better now,” he tells Luke, reaching for him and determined to have him. He pulls at Luke’s shoulder and Luke comes; climbs more carefully than someone with such long limbs should be able to manage to lie curled up behind Calum, big in ways that make Calum seem small like this; folded close like he thinks he’s pushing his luck, even though Calum wants him so much closer than this, needs him next to him always. 

Calum feels safe. Calum feels loved.

Maybe it’s not exactly the way he wants, but right now it will do. Like this, with no one else around to get in the way, it’s more than enough.

Luke catches Calum up on what’s going on where Calum is supposed to be; whispering to him about things he can’t bring himself to care about when he has Luke spooned up behind him, letting Calum pull his arm all the way around him.

“I missed you. I like you the most,” Luke whispers with the hot line of his jaw hooked up over Calum’s bare shoulder, and Calum can do nothing at all to quell the shiver this sends rippling through him, pain and exhaustion making his eyes well up, which Calum would find humiliating if he could think beyond how good Luke feels behind him and over him, how comforting it is just to be able to smell the way he smells: like fresh air in brand new places, like some kind of sugar that isn’t so sweet, like a home Calum wants to be welcome in. 

Luke leans up over him to drop a kiss to Calum’s cheek, then, and follows it up by setting his mouth to rest pressed just above the first rise of Calum’s spine.

Calum doesn’t say anything, just keeps Luke close and lets his eyes drop shut, retreating into darkness and silence until whenever they’re pulled away to get onstage.

It’s not like him to be silent, but Luke doesn’t call him on it, only wriggles closer and stays there, still and quiet. 

Calum doesn’t say anything because he knows that no matter what he thinks to say in response, no matter what he tries to say out loud, what will come out instead is a pathetic, yearning “love me instead, please.”

**Author's Note:**

> Not true, not profitable, purely for entertainment purposes.


End file.
